「Behind the Cape」Your Definitive Guide to: Is Batman Really a Superhero?, SuperMasturbation, the Most Craptastic Batman Accessory Ever & Other “Important” Mysteries of the Universe Explained~!~! ^^*


~Gone Batty~



Getting up really early in the morning is no fun but one perk of being up so early is that the best radio program on earth airs live during these wee hours of the morning~. And that would be Mike and Mike in the Morning~♥! My love affair with this program all began one fateful morning when during my morning daze I totally goofed and forgot to bring anything to listen to in the car for my morning commute, now mind you I’ve never been a fan of any sort of radio program since I was little however on this morning all I had was a radio =P and no choice…. but as they say sometimes things are just meant to be and for the better. So now during my hazy commutes I’m delighted daily to the minds, colorful personalities, opinions and voices of Mike Greenberg and Mike Golic who make getting up so so much better and it’s actually a part of my day which I really look forward to now =D.

So on one particular morning of the 7th from many moons ago and amidst all of the sports talk and commentary there came up the then new Avengers movie which had just opened and anyway you just have to watch this yourself because it is so~so funny I promise!!


~Mike and Mike discuss whether Batman is a superhero~


Some great points from both guys…but I guess it really depends on which side of the debate you’re on if all can be validated as such. I cracked up so much when Golic mentioned how Batman’s head doesn’t move and then he’s looking for Robin wondering where he is because he can’t see him omg that it sooooo funny and now when I think of the old Superfriends cartoon…yeah really true!! They’re so great and perfect~* together these two guys…so so so so different in backgrounds, prior professions, build and personality and that’s what makes them so immaculately made for one another on this show.


For Batman is a superhero

  • Has super smarts
  • With at least half an hour of prep time he’d kick anyone’s butt
  • Has the coolest vehicle the Batmobile
  • Is the coolest superhero, he’s dark and angry (says Greeny =D )
  • Rugged, strong and fights for justice
  • Was on the cartoon Superfriends
  • Has a dark aura about him
  • Has the outfit…mask and cape
  • Utility belt is ready for just about any occasion
  • His wealth adds as an enabler for his cause
  • Has Robin


For Batman is not a superhero

  • Has no super powers
  • Is basically MacGyver with more money and a better belt
  • Made the Superfriends exciting by falling into peril and needing to be saved by the other real superheroes
  • Could not turn his head to look around causing him to lose sight of Robin (that according to Golic…(^q^)!)
  • Would get his butt kicked by fellow superheroes in a WWE cage match
  • Has Robin

So, do you think Batman is a superhero or not?


~The Most Craptastic Batman Accessory Ever!~



The evolution of Halloween costumes and really costumes in general have advanced so far in just a few years of late. But if you turn back the clock and investigate our Halloween’s past then you’ll discover that even back in the latter 80’s there was still much to be desired of said celebrated attire or in some cases not so much celebrated but rather downright shameful attire xD. We may have advanced far past the age of the crappy monster or hero mask made of flimsy cardboard whose only hope of remaining in place upon you face were a couple of staples and a overstretched rubber band holding it all together around the back of your head (-∀-`)...but it’s still most amusing to hear about how your parents used to dress up back then and reminisce:). Okay I wasn’t quite unfortunate enough to have witnessed those cardboard monstrosities personally but I can so sympathize…. laugh and then sympathize some more =P. Seriously though if back in the day you were all hyped up on Batman with him being your favorite and wanted to dress up as the caped crusader whether it had been your fantasy to jump from rooftop to rooftop (not recommended  Σ(゜ロ゜;ノ)ノ!)or just go out candy hunting for Halloween with the coolness and toughness of Batman upon you the scary thought is that you may have encountered this thing ↓↓↓↓




I love how you’re being encouraged directly by the milk carton itself here as you’re instructed to cut out this “Batman”~esque ‘mask’ from this umm…. milk carton’s side and place it upon your face for a fun night out of humiliation and you smelling really really bad after just a few hours of that ‘fun’ have gone bad too (ノロ≦。)!!!!Could be sooner though depending on the warmth and humidity in your neighborhood that night and can you imagine how this thing on your face would have potentially smelt?? Well wash it all you like and I mean milk does the body good and all just ask Nana….


got milk

..but whose odd and albeit ambitious and yet poorly planned idea was this to encourage kids to wear such a misguided and ultimately stinky thing along with your friends on such a big night for kids? (*>ω<)!!!!!!!!!!!

 gift box over white background 3d illustration

~”Say Robin, could you hold my utility belt while I masturbate?….”



There was a time when Happy Meals were just that, happy:).



And Batman was ferociously tough as nails ー(* ̄O ̄)ノ!



And yet.

We’re all human.

We have urges.

I mean even heroes must get horny at times Ummm right??

It’s just that you’d never expect to find with your Happy Meal:) a Batman who’d rather use all of his abilities for masturbation rather than fighting the good fight against you know, the bad guys (*≧∀≦)☆★ ↓!



I just came across this…pardon the pun xD and so why is Batman accomplishing such a ‘deed’ here =P? Haha who in the world designed this thing?? It boggles the mind so funny…(^q^)! Am I also hearing what sounds like masturbation itself?…I mean that sound in which this toy makes while Batman feverishly does his thing* next to your once Happy Meal =O….I can only speak for girls but that sound* yeah okay maybe:).

And you know now I’m beginning to side with Golic a bit more on “Batman not being a superhero”…. like maybe he’s just a horny guy with a utility belt and tights is all? (*´艸`)。

Kind of gives an entirely new meaning to the phrase ‘The Dark Knight rises…’….dontcha think?

 baby crying

~But(t) Seriously, Batman ー(* ̄O ̄)ノ!...




Can you just feel the widespread love for all things Batman (*´∀`)ー♥♥♥!


It’s just an “ordinary” Thursday and if you thought things couldn’t get any stranger here’s this oddity from the realm of Batman….

As kids I’m pretty sure we all loved the occasional squirt gun play and especially on a hot and humid summer’s day and yet I think most of us never had the opportunity to pull the trigger on one of these freakish things =O.



Yup it’s a Batman squirt gun but the only issues here are that after filling him up with h2o via his butt~ (for lack of a better description as I’m afraid it literally is where the water appears to go~ (・д・`*)!!!you then squeeze his thingy* in his crotch area which doubles as a odd placed trigger~penis which then propels the water out of his mouth. Now how creepy is this thing really??? In essence when you spray your friends with this thing it’s like you’re showering them with a special Batman upchuck enema of sorts…(゜Д゜;)!!



And now I’m really looking forward to seeing what Batman brings to the cinema next!~! I just hope it makes me as happy as this ‘toy.’ ー(* ̄O ̄)ノ!



Have a nice day!

About MorningBerryz

Lover and free spirit who's interests in Japanese culture and the like are insatiable. I am of pure Japanese/Okinawan descent, love my cats, sleep and am a bit naughty at times :).
This entry was posted in batman, Humor and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to 「Behind the Cape」Your Definitive Guide to: Is Batman Really a Superhero?, SuperMasturbation, the Most Craptastic Batman Accessory Ever & Other “Important” Mysteries of the Universe Explained~!~! ^^*

  1. Matthew says:

    Who’s bright idea was to make a squirt gun of Batman? I can’t imagine Batman hugging Pooh. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    • It’s rather that design for said squirt gun which is so highly questionable =O as in where the water goes in and where its trigger is located, just so amusingly ill designed LOL =P. What’s even funnier about that particular image is that Pooh is actually a lot bigger than The Dark Knight, I mean bears are no doubt larger creatures than man but I just never saw Pooh being illustrated as being a particularly large bear =O. In any case the debate on whether Batman is actually a superhero rages on, I believe he totally is but there is room for amusing arguments as proved by that funny video clip =).

      Liked by 1 person

Say something nice

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s